Sometimes life becomes so full and busy!
Oh I rush and rush until life’s no fun
All I really gotta do is live and die
But I’m in a hurry and don’t know why.”
Sometimes life becomes so full and busy!
The journey of “Letting Go,” is far more complex than it sounds. Especially because often times there is so much that we have been holding on to…
Judgments, fears, sadness, shame, doubt, concern… you name it.
As much as there can be, freedom, surrender, joy, openness, trust, expression, often times for people it is much easier to dwell in the remnants of those heavier places. Whether we are the ones who caused the suffering or it was someone else, these pieces that we have known, are simply part of the human experience.
Remembering we are much larger than the sum of our parts, there is still something quite simple and beautiful, and it is in finding the hidden gems buried deep underneath the surface. Much like diamonds, which take rigorous work to mine, extract, and harvest, not to mention the amount of time and thousands of pounds of pressure it takes to cultivate a precious gem deep in Mother Earth herself.
Just as there are precious hidden gems within Pacha Mama (Earth Mother), there are hidden gems within every individual you meet, including your treasured self.
Like mining diamonds and gems, it takes loads of time, serious work, deep digging, and sometimes what feels like thousands of pounds of pressure to discover these gifts.
Hey, if it were easy, everyone would be doing it!
There are many ways to find the hidden gems.
For me, learning to let go, has been a beautifully challenging process that has taken many years. Sometimes easier than others. I would equate it to stripping away layers and build-up. Much like brushing our teeth, if you allow too much time between each brushing of those precious bones, a filmy, fuzzy build-up will eventually ensue. Letting go requires a habitual daily (potentially moment to moment) practice of cleansing, similar to oral and overall, general hygiene.
As life carries on though, we must consistently flush out the old and in call in the new.
Not always just letting go, but filling the space with a reminder or intention. For example, “Oh wow, I just really made a big mistake… (As I take a deep breath) Well that happened, moving on, and I will do better next time.” You could be more specific than that and fill in the blanks of the mistake and the improvement for next time. It could be minuscule or grandiose, something someone said or did at work, something awkward or embarrassing, anything irritating will certainly work, you get the idea.
The concept is that letting go, like most things, can become a mindfulness practice. A very healing and loving process. A process of non-judgment, but calling things for what they are, and calling in the alternative. It becomes a place of immediate forgiveness for the self and others. It puts the mind at rest and ceases the mental chatter from continuing telling that specific story.
The art of letting go, is a continual dance with forgiveness.
Little by little as we learn to forgive small things, we can eventually work on much larger things. There is no order to where forgiveness begins, but if something much larger is haunting you, perhaps starting with some simple awareness in your daily life and current relationships, can eventually allow you to step into deeper areas of your life and past relationships that could use greater forgiveness and compassion.
As I awoke this morning, I read a quote that inspired this piece from my own personal practice…
“Forgiveness is not an occasional act; it is a constant attitude.” -Martin Luther King Jr.
I invite you to memorize this quote and recite it to yourself as many times as needed, for as long as you like. Let it be a reminder that as we free up space, and habitually let go, just like we brush our teeth or wash our hands, that there is more room within to explore and find our own hidden gems, ultimately allowing the ability to see the hidden gems in others.
There is a beautiful Mantra (Chant) in Sanskrit (Ancient language of India)-
Om mani padme hum- Behind it all, there is a jewel at the heart center of the lotus.
Just as the beautifully, bright, expansive lotus flower grows in polluted, murky, muddy waters, each of us has a beautiful gem (many) patiently waiting to be discovered in all of our imperfections and messy human ways.
The journey of letting go is for our own freedom and happiness, which in turn radiates out to the world, like the exquisite, unwavering lotus flower, which evolves in the contaminated, shallow waters with its flexible stem that does not break~
Keep on shining!
Thanks for reading 🙂
I am a Sensual Goddess–
It exists within every cell of my being.
It is written in the stars.
Lasciviously Divine & in my power.
I once had a taste of this for a short period of time in this life-
Somewhere along the way, through the deep hurt & pain, through the times of being taken for granted & under appreciation, through the unrecognized gratitude, through the lies, the deceit, the times I did not listen to my inner wise womyn who was always there, I slowly cracked & chipped away little pieces of my heart and soul- small but true.
My light carried me through every step of the way & the shadows my candle flame created followed me everywhere I went.
The shadows quietly whispering for my attention- I overlooked.
Until one day they stared me straight in my eyes-
And the funny thing is, I knew them all along, from the time they were just little ones.
They grew & advanced their way.
There was fear for but a moment.
Soon I realized they were my friends.
They loved me like family.
My greatest teachers.
And in time, I grew to love them too.
The light is not the only thing to show you the way, for the shadow reminds us to seek the light.
They too are friends & allow each one to exist.
A beautiful communion.
A Divine Cosmic Dance.
So here I am, Divine & unique.
Remembering purity & innocence.
Awakening & opening.
I am ready & expansive beyond my wildest dreams.
To infinity and beyond!
Free of fear.
The little pieces of my heart & soul lovingly returned.
Mine to keep.
I am whole.
I am healthy.
I am love.
I am ready!
I will ask for what I need.
I am open to embody and experience joy and pleasure in every luscious cell of my delicious Divine being & body.
I am no longer afraid…
To be seen.
To be fully in my POWER- In all its beautiful, wild and possibly even terrifying forms.
No matter what, my heart is open- infinite love to give.
The pain and hurt showed me how to love ever more.
So I will say it one more time right now-
I am a Sensual Goddess.
It exists within in every cell of my being.
It is written in the stars.
Here we are again, another revolution around the sun! Happy 2017 folks!
As I have taken a sabbatical from writing for a few months, I must say that it feels good to sit down in this moment, and what a great way to start the year.
Typically the new year brings in a lot of discussion around new resolutions and becoming a better person every year. In some ways, this seems like a bit of a joke because how many people are actually sticking to their goals?
About 7 years ago, I had a gym membership. It was lovely. I enjoyed taking classes and I loved having a place I could shake off some steam while listening to my favorite jams in my own little world. I remember going into the gym the first week of January to see almost every treadmill full. This was a rather large facility, so there were probably about 60-70 treadmills. I remember being astonished and thinking what is going on here? Completely perplexed for a moment, I soon realized that following the new years day, everyone suddenly hit it hard! Funny thing was, that lasted about a week and then they slowly started to drop like flies, and then I was free to use the treadmill again, yippee!
But seriously, what is it that inspires people for a brief moment to better their lives, to suddenly leave it all behind so soon?
Often times, as humans we seem to be so wrapped up in our monkey minds running around in circles. If we aren’t caught in one thought loop about what errands we must accomplish for the day, we are thinking about what someone else said or did earlier, or off in some distant daydream about next week. There are an infinite amount of worlds we can wonder off to in our minds from moment to moment. I recently learned about a man named Milton H. Erickson who was an American Psychologist/Psychiatrist that specialized in hypnosis. His work emphasized how the modern human (through serious mass conditioning) is walking around in a state of hypnosis. It is as if most humans are in a trance most of the time, totally unaware of the state they are living in.
Hey we are all guilty of it from time to time. This is not good or bad, it simply is.
It is as if the new year shakes us up for a moment and wakes us up briefly, to then fall right back to the comfortable, easy, old, and often stagnant patterns we we were living before.
The reason why I bring this up first and foremost, is because awareness is the key. It is the key to making any change no matter how seemingly insignificant or grandiose that transformation may be.
Rewinding back 7 years ago to these New Year resolutions, intentions and goal setting, why were the treadmills full for a week and then nothing?
We set a goal or have an idea for the turn of the year, to give it up or leave it all behind shortly following.
One thing that seems to be crucial is setting attainable goals.
What I have observed is that most people set BIG goals, which is great, however, a baby learns to walk by slowly developing neck and arm muscles, then abdominal, low back and core muscles. Many times attempting to lift their bodies, soon rocking back and forth and falling. At times, slightly on all fours, hands and knees, eventually using the table or parents support to gain the ability to stand with unstable balance to eventually putting one foot in front of the other, and still many more times falling. Eventually, walking ensues.
So what about small goals each step of the way towards the big goal, which sometimes takes days, weeks, months, and even years to achieve.
The news years intention I once made, that same new years I mentioned 7 years ago at the gym, was a small but beautiful goal. The goal was to simply remember peoples names. It is funny how easy it is to forget peoples names and remember faces. I believe from my experience, it is because we usually are so wrapped up in first impressions when we meet someone, that we do not usually focus and listen when someone says there name. Hearing and listening are totally different things. It was the first small goal that I made one New Year, and actually stuck with. It is truly an honor to remember peoples names, and watch how someone lights up when you remember their name! Peoples names are special, even if it does not seem like a big deal.
Currently in my life, my intention is to connect with my breath and to come back to the present moment. Often times my mind wonders to another land that is no where near the present, but if I catch my self for just a moment I pause and focus on my deep inhalation and my relieving exhalation to find that for one round of breath I am here. This is a seemingly small attainable goal. Over time I have found myself having many more of these simple yet sweet moments, where nothing else matters.
The next part of intention or goal setting, is honesty.
Are you being honest with yourself about the time frame of achieving your goal, and are you really ready to give up certain things, or change certain habits to achieve that goal? If you are not totally ready, what are some baby steps that you could take to make it easier for yourself?
Using my above example about my breathing, sometimes in the past I have tried to sit and focus on my breathing for five minutes which was to long for me. This would stir up a lot of agitation, as I was not ready to sit that long staying connected to the moment with my breath. So I have worked towards focusing for three rounds of breath to five rounds, and eventually to ten rounds. Slowly working myself to a place where I can sit for extended periods of time. This is a work in progress and probably always will be. I accept that. For years though I have essentially put off sitting meditation because the thought of sitting for an hour seemed impossible. Luckily there are many ways to meditate that do not involve sitting.
The last part that I am thinking of right now is the enjoyment.
What is the long term joy, and are you enjoying yourself through the process? You have to find ways to love what you are doing, otherwise you will do it for a week maybe a little longer and then eventually quit, because lets face it, life is good and we enjoy pleasure! No shame there.
Resolution means a firm decision to do or not do something. Intention means an aim or plan. Either one of these will do, I personally like to work with intentions because there is an understanding that things do not always go to plan, and that we can modify appropriately as we go along.
I am noticing I am able to find joy with my breathing because of how it makes me feel. Each day is different, some moments I can only focus for a round of breath and I am grateful, other times I can drop in for ten rounds. Like I said it is a process and I am paying attention to where I find joy in these moments.
There are many people in this world reaching for the stars and continuously working diligently towards their goals and aspirations. We are all here in this together and we can each inspire and remind one another along the way!
As most of us work to be the best versions of ourselves, remember, it is not about how you want to look, or the things that you would like to have, but the joy and happiness you wish to find. Consider setting intentions this new year for the way you would like to feel, instead of for the things that you think will make you happy.
Awareness, attainable goals, honesty and enjoyment can take us a long way this new year and all the years to come. May this new year be filled with blessings for you and your loved ones, and may it be permeated with much laughter and good health! Thanks for reading (:)
What is all the talk about LOVE?
You are Love.
You are Loved!
I love you.
What does it all mean?
Well for a second, lets just talk about the opposite of love…
Not hate, no no. Breaking it down even one step further than that… Violence. I say this word violence because the only (often not so noticeable) attribute that hate truly invites along with it, is violence. Usually on a very subtle level.
Many of us may be working on the journey towards LOVE. Loving life, loving ourselves, loving one another. Whether on a conscious level or not, we may have one thing that profoundly inhibits us on this journey… VIOLENCE.
Violence is everywhere!
Seriously, please stop and consider for a moment- How much violence is in your daily, moment-to-moment life?
This may seem peculiar, you may even be thinking “I am not a violent person”, “I do not interact with violent people”, “yes, violence is on the news but not in my personal life!”
Violence may appear to be on the outside.
Violence must be recognized for the many masks it wears.
As violence can be anything that causes harm or unpleasant emotions, no matter how large or small, we must learn to distinguish it, in its many forms…
And most importantly- when you do any or all of the above, immediately find compassion for being a human- not as a cop-out either, but stop and take a moment to truly forgive yourself (or another) for thinking that thought or feeling that emotion, and take a moment truly set an intention for how you could handle that situation differently in the future.
*** A practice that I have found helpful- Anytime I notice any thoughts creep in, that are not serving the highest good, I begin to set the intention or pray essentially, calling upon forgiveness towards that situation or person, and then towards myself. It is a practice I have discovered which has made a tremendous difference in my life. It becomes far to heavy to carry around those thoughts and feelings. It is not healthy for you or anyone else if you are sending out those thoughts and feelings into the world like a radio transmitter.
Even as violence blasts through the airwaves, the media, each other, our heads, as the list goes on, we still have a choice in every moment. That does not mean that this will be an easy choice in every moment, but a choice no less. Vigilance is required.
In the Yogic tradition, there is a way, known as the eight-fold path. This path is simply there to assist human beings on their journey back to truth and inner peace, allowing union with all that IS, was, and ever will be. The poetry of Yoga and these 8 main disciplines, were shared with the world by one (or many) known as Patanjali.
Among the eight main disciplines, the first two disciplines help us to deepen our understanding of how to remain on this righteous path. The first discipline teaches us about specific restraints when working with external forces and temptations surrounding us constantly in everyday life, these are known in Sanskrit (classical, sacred Indian language) as Yamas. The second discipline guides us to observe the inner workings of the mind and these are referee to as the Niyamas. Although the Yogic tradition is a philosophy not a religion, many different religions around the world have similar concepts for how to live a virtuous life. Keep in mind here, however, that the word religious comes from Latin re– which means “again”, and lego- “choose”, “go over again” or “consider carefully”, or ligo “bind, connect”. The word religious can simply mean to choose again or to connect again.
To live any way that you want to live in this world, whatever that vision may look like, you will have to do things religiously. The contrary is true as well, if you are living in such a way that is no longer serving you or others, perhaps it could be time to alter the ways in which you have been religiously (choosing over and over again) acting or reacting.
“If you always do what you have always done, you will always get what you have always gotten.”
The very first sub-section of the first disciplines of the eight-fold path of Yoga, which are known as the Yamas, is the Sanskrit word Ahimsa, which means non-violence. It can also mean, not to injure, not to harm, or compassion.
I like to point out that compassion is truly recognizing that we all have experienced suffering and acknowledging the oneness and connection to this very real, raw experience that we share as humans.
The adventure towards LOVE, ultimately requires an awareness and a willingness to explore the depths of our being and to clean out any build-up we have acquired throughout our lifetime and to rediscover purity. We must continuously weed the garden of our mind. From moment to moment, constantly taking out the trash and recycling.
The practice of Ahimsa or non-violence, to ourselves, others, the planet, can become a habit, just like all of the habits we already have religiously implemented in our moment to moment existence. The first division of the Niyamas (inner observances) is known as Soucha, which means cleanliness of body and mind. This will naturally fall into place as we practice the first focus of Ahimsa (non-violence). This is just one part of the equation of a journey back to the place within, the place where Love is infinite and beyond. Underneath it all, there is an essence so pure that can never be touched or changed. I believe we each carry this essence within. I believe this is where Love and all of creation came from and where we all return back to. “As above, so below, as within, so without.”
Thank you for reading (:)
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Sometimes, actually almost always, when I sit down to write, I have no idea what is going to come flowing through my fingertips. There is a beauty in this. A fearlessness. No expectations. Just trusting that when the moment arrives, spirit will move through me and the creative process begins again. To be IN SPIRIT aka INSPIRED is where we can truly tap in to the juicy goodness of creation.
Almost one year ago, I started writing my monthly blog. What I have been finding since this journey began, is that often a few days or weeks before I sit down to actually write the blog, there is a moment where a word or thought will pop up in my mind, and I know instantly that somehow that thing will be apart of my writing. Still not knowing, nor planning my transcription, just simply trusting that when the time is right, this vessel that I live in, aka this glorious body, will align with mind and spirit to create! Of course recognizing, that no-thing “I” do is actually “mine” or “me”, but spirit moving through this container.
With that being said, Humility was the word that popped up yesterday, and I instantly knew that was what I would be writing about today. Now this word “humility” may seem obvious, and perhaps it is, but I thought it best to give it a closer examination.
This past month for three weeks, I spent two weeks at one of my favorite places in the world, at a lake in Guatemala surrounded by volcanos, followed by a week at the beach in South Carolina for my Mom’s 50th birthday with a house full of family and friends. Upon my arrival back into the United States, and then eventually back to my home in California, I found that I was humbled many times over this three week period.
Humility in a few simple definitions:
Humility can also refer to self-restraint from excessive vanity.
Some of my experiences over this three week period.
My first week at the lake in Guatemala, I was a part of a womens retreat. Women aging from 21-65. It was a beautiful and fun assortment of us all celebrating together and participating in dance and rituals of connection to mother earth and to one another. I discovered a sense of modesty in that I have been following my passions, these things that drive me. As I am utterely filled with gratitude for my opportunities as a caucasion woman, born and raised in the United States, with work opportunities, education, and freedoms that are lacking in other areas of the world, I was reminded that not everyone gets the opportunities, especially being in a third world country. Acknowledging that we are all on different paths and have different circumstances, my opportunities have been given to me so that I may ultimately help others. Remembering we have been given two hands, one hand for receiving and one for giving. I am maximizing the tools that I have been so fortunate to acquire in my life. This humility, a reminder for me to continue with my sacred work- my mission to be of service to others and the planet. This will follow me wherever I go. There is always an opportunity to share, teach, learn, inspire, and be inspired.
Then there was being deeply humbled by nature and further recognizing my desire to be subservient to her. Finding profound connections with this body which came from mother earth. To the animals and plants that help keep everything in balance and make the world more beautiful. To mother earth for supporting us without expecting anything in return.
Even as I try to always be the best version of myself, I still have moments were I make silly unnecessary mistakes. I found humility after trying to bargain for a high qulaity item with a local Guatemalan woman because I was buying multiple items, and thats what you do in a foreign country, right? Not necessarily. As I walked away paying more than I wanted too, I immediately felt so glad that I purchased from this sweet little lady and her hard work. I am no higher, no better. I shifted the old thinking pattern of needing a bargain or a “good deal”.
When it came to spending time with my family, I found myself humbled by our differences and still finding a way within myself to remain courteously respectful in recognizing we are each on our own path. Continually working to find compassion. For the first time, I saw my grandfather, the man I looked up to as a role model and father figure, as a human being, with some of his own wounds and needless suffering. I pray that he meets his inner peaceful warrior with the same love and understanding that I still see in him.
Humbled by beautiful Goddess women of all ages at the womens retreat and feeling the oppression that the patriarch has instilled upon all of those in the feminine physical form. As women cried and shared truth of the wounds in the ancestral lineage of all beings on planet earth, I felt the shame and pain for all those who have come before. I recognized that even some of my own loving family members (men especially), have belittled women without even realizing it. Their intentions were meant well, but from societal conditioning, the continued to pass on the oppression, shame, fear, doubt, etc. There once was a time before written records, where society was centered around women. Where the divine femnine was truly revered as the creation force. Where the logical masculine may have lurked in the shadows, but the loving, intuitive, feminine, softness made way and honored the masculine for the balance that it brought to the whole. This experience was first humbling and then empowering.
Some food for thought…
“True humility is not thinking less of yourself; it is thinking of yourself less.”
― C.S. Lewis
The Latin breakdown for humility comes from humulis which transitions to grounded or from earth.
Until just now, I had never considered the expression “down to earth.” A person who is grounded, balanced, pragmatic, sensible. Someone that people feel comfortable around because they are humble and modest folks. Someone who can “come back down to earth,” and recognize, while we are all here on planet earth sharing a human experience, we are all in this together.
Let us bow down to earth and each other in reverence!
How interesting that some of my experiences during those weeks continued to remind me of this divine experience of being a spirit in a physical form, from mother earth herself? One day as I was dancing, rediscovering freedom, as I do everytime I dance, a deep knowing that every cell in our body, every part of our body came from earth, water, fire, air, and ether/spirit. One little body seems so insignificant in the greater scheme of things. Yes, again humbled and reverent.
One of the seven deadly sins is PRIDE, and the heavenly virtue of this is HUMILITY.
Lastly, a humbling reminder…
“It is unwise to be too sure of one’s own wisdom. It is healthy to be reminded that the strongest might weaken and the wisest might err.”
― Mahatma Gandhi
Thanks for reading (:)
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Hey. I love you.
Do you love you?
Well, it is okay if the answer is “yes”, “no”, “sometimes”, “I don’t know, “what do you mean?”
Any answer will suffice.
Sometimes it is easier to love some parts of ourselves and not others. That happens quite often.
The truth is, the journey of loving others, deeply begins within ourselves. When we have enough filling us up from within, there comes a point when the vessel is full and the love begins to overflow, pouring out into everything surrounding. This is quite a beautiful process. On the contrary, if our vessels are empty and depleted, how will we ever have more to give? We will constantly be puttering along on empty because the world is going to take regardless. Wouldn’t it be nice if we chose what to give away? And if we reap what we sow, shouldn’t the choice always be to share love and do everything from a loving place within?
Without going too far down a rabbit hole here, there are numerous ways in which we can begin taking action towards bringing more self-loving practices into our daily lives. Which in turn will help each of us before stepping out in to the chaos of everyday life as a human being.
Another very important truth is that loving ourselves is a journey and at times can be very challenging work. It takes time and patience, but you are totally and completely worth it! We all are.
Over the past few years, I learned that the need for self-loving practices becomes significantly more important. Especially as life throws us some curve balls, and our once fluid minds become more crystalline and less fluid. We must work hard each day to keep things flowing and growing.
As I have heard people around me question the concept of self-love, it started to get me thinking about what self-love could look like. It can mean lots of things and maybe you are already doing some of these practices, and if so that is wonderful, keep up the great job! Here are some ways to implement some daily rituals for more self-love to help us to stay grounded, and connected to ourselves. Furthermore, we can begin healing and transforming broken parts of ourselves and learning how to love some of those more challenging areas within which are not separate from us.
The list could go on for days I am certain. I hope you can take away at least one new thing that could help make your days a little more calm, peaceful, and connected to yourself, as well as others!
Love is an inside job.
Sometimes people confuse self-love with narcissism, but in reality, self-love can be a simple act or actions that ultimately affect ones own well-being, and happiness. Self-care is an act of self-love. Try it out! If you have any loving acts that you can recommend or any comments, feel free to leave a note down below.
Thanks for reading (:)
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